I hate you and love you at the same time.

But right now I just want to watch you burn.

I’d love to throw all of your clothes out of this house, all of your shit in a dumpster and throw you out of my life. But i can’t and I hate it. I hate that you left me out of no where and my heart is so lonely that I’m looking anywhere for human contact, for someone to like me and to be with me.

You could have at least given me some fucking warning, I would’ve had time to prepare and build up a shell to store myself in until I was ready to expose my heart and head again. But you didn’t you fucking bastard. You’re one the most idiotic people I have ever met. I took you in when your parents were kicking you out, I fed you with my own money that I never saw in return, I got you clothes and washed the mountains of dirty laundry when it only takes me two loads to clean my stuff. I dealt with how dirty you were when you got home and how disgusting you left the house. I made excuses for you to my room-mates and I made excuses for you to myself. I  hate you. I hate that I can’t chill with your family anymore because dammit I liked them and they liked me.

You’re an idiot for losing me, everyone that knows you has said the same damn  thing. 

I will get through this and get over you.

(via etiquetteforalady)

(via etiquetteforalady)

My depression is so strong right now. I don’t know where this came from, it sprung up out of no where. And the one person that I want to lean against hasn’t been here all weekend, hasn’t even slept next to me when he is here. Writing this, let alone thinking about it just makes me want to kill myself. I don’t even know why I’m in Maryland anymore. I don’t even like it here. I miss Florida and how simple it was then. I know it’s not simple anymore. I hate this. I hate feeling like I should be dead.

I’d love to have him. Sexy man right there.